So Close, Yet So Far
by I heart Sesshomaru
Summary: Naruto's thoughts during his most recent confrontation with Sasuke in chapter 486 of the manga. Sasu/Naru


So this is what I'd like to think is going on in Naruto's head during his most recent confrontation with Sasuke in chapters 486 and 487 of the manga. Usually I need slash goggles, but these chapters were just so full of slashy-goodness by itself. I don't know what Kishi is planning, but I like it!

-x-

He wanted to kill him. He really and truly wanted to kill him. When their jutsu's met, Naruto had felt the anger and hatred and killing intent flowing from Sasuke in waves, crashing against him, threatening to drown him.

'_Sasuke… what's happened to you?'_

He had wondered that many times… but he understood now. After eight years of building up his hatred for his brother, Sasuke had finally gotten his revenge… only to discover everything he thought he knew was a lie. He had killed the last remaining member of his family, his own brother, who he believed had massacred their clan out of a heartless desire to test his abilities. But the truth was, the elders of Konoha had ordered Itachi to murder his own family to protect the village. Sasuke had been misguided and manipulated for most of his life.

So Naruto couldn't really blame his friend's descent into darkness. What he had been through was enough to drive anyone insane. That's why Naruto wasn't particularly concerned with the fact that his best friend wanted to tear him into pieces. In fact, it had solidified his decision.

'_Konoha is going to get rid of Sasuke. That's what all your age-mates are planning.'_

'_Danzo has given permission to dispose of Sasuke as a missing-nin.'_

'_We will have our revenge! We'll destroy Uchiha!'_

'_Sasuke is only helping spread darkness across the world. Letting him live will only sow the seeds of another war.'_

'_Sakura plans to kill Sasuke herself.'_

'_Sasuke has stopped looking for you. He seeks only the darkness of his own free will.'_

'_As Sasuke's friend, you know what you have to do.'_

"Now I'm certain." He said to himself as he stared across the gorge at Sasuke, who stared back blankly. Everyone had given up on Sasuke, but Naruto still believed in him. He still saw a small flicker of hope buried deep within the darkness. He understood Sasuke's reason for wanting to kill him, and he understood something about his own reasons for refusing to let go. He had been thinking about Sasuke a lot recently, more so than usual, and Naruto realized that he had been ignoring certain feelings for a long time. But not anymore.

Just then a swirling vortex appeared beside Sasuke and the freaky plant guy, and Tobi – Madara- whoever - appeared.

"I thought I told you to come back and rest." He said to Sasuke, who didn't acknowledge his appearance and continued to gaze at Naruto.

"Ah, the nine-tails." Tobi fixed his one visible eye on Naruto as well. He glared back hardly, hating the sight of his ugly, orange mask.

'_First Orochimaru, now this guy.'_ Naruto thought, '_They're all just using you, Sasuke. Can't you see that?!'_

Of course he could. But Sasuke no longer cared, Naruto knew. As long as it meant getting his revenge.

"When we do fight them, it'll be in a more suitable place. For now, we retreat."

Screw this guy, Naruto wasn't going to let his appearance deter him from what he had to say. He was going to make Sasuke listen to him, even if it was just for a few moments. He needed him to know the truth. Naruto walked forward, still staring at Sasuke. They had not broken eye contact the entire time.

"Naruto…" Kakashi began.

"I know." Naruto said, "But first there's something I need to say to Sasuke."

Tobi bent down next to Sasuke and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Come on, Sasuke."

"Wait." Sasuke stood up and watched as Naruto walked closer. A little flitter of happiness floated across Naruto's chest. It couldn't be helped.

"Sasuke… do you remember what you told me back in the Valley of the End? About top-class ninjas? I understand a lot more, after exchanging blows. That means we've become top-class ninjas, Sasuke. You and I…" Naruto stopped walking and took a deep breath before continuing.

"So tell me… did you see what was in my heart? How I really feel?"

Naruto had only recently understood how he really felt, himself. But looking back now, he didn't know how he hadn't figured things out sooner. It explained all his actions, why, even after all these years, he was still chasing after him.

"Did you see what'll happen? If we fight again… we will both die."

Sasuke didn't show any reaction to his words. Did he understand what Naruto meant?

"Our battle will be inevitable if you really do attack the village. So keep your hatred, let if fester… and hit me with it full force. I'm the only one who can bear the full brunt of your hate. It's my job, no one else's!"

He wasn't going to let Sasuke fight with anyone else. He couldn't. Sasuke was _his_ responsibility.

"I'll bear the burden of your hatred… and we'll die together!"

That finally sparked a reaction in the brunette.

"What? What the fuck is wrong with you!? Why do you care about me so much?" Sasuke shouted, his expressionless mask seemed to slip a fraction. He was always unsettled when Naruto voiced his feelings, even back then.

'_Why Naruto? Why do you go so far for me?'_

'_Because… because I… I…'_

They were all right… unless Sasuke's hate vanished, he couldn't be allowed to roam free. But Naruto refused to let anyone kill him. No one was going to lay a finger on Sasuke. No one but him. If Sasuke was going to be killed, Naruto was going to be the one to do it. And if Sasuke wasn't able to deal a fatal blow before the end, then Naruto would find some other way to follow him. All he knew, was that he wouldn't be able to kill Sasuke unless he knew he was going to die as well. Naruto couldn't be without him. Because he…

"Because I'm your friend."

He couldn't bring himself to say it. Not here, in front of those people. Not in front of Sakura and Kakashi. But Sasuke was able to see the deeper meaning behind his words. His blank mask was completely gone and he stared back at Naruto with wide eyes.

"Sasuke… we'll never be able to understand each other through words alone. I knew that from the moment I met you. The only way you and I can communicate properly is with our fists! Remember what I said… we're both top-class ninja now."

'_You understand now, how I really feel about you. Maybe if we can understand each other, I can change all that hate, like Iruka-sensei did for me.'_

Sasuke quickly composed himself as Naruto continued.

"I haven't given up yet! Still… I'm done ranting at you." Naruto grinned, "Hell, I can barely string a sentence together… I shouldn't be lecturing anyone."

He laughed softly and rubbed a hand through his blonde spikes.

"If we really do take this all the way to the end, and we both die, we won't be Uchiha's or jinchuuriki's or anything. There'll be no more burdens to bear."

'_You won't have to suffer anymore, Sasuke.'_

"We'll come to understand each other in the next world!"

'_I'll be with you. We'll finally be at peace. You can see your family, your brother, again. And I… I won't have this stupid fox inside me anymore. And you and I… we can be together. Like we could've been had it been under different circumstances.'_

"I will never change!" Sasuke said, "I don't want us to understand one another! And I'm not going to die… you will."

Naruto expected he would say that, but it didn't deter him. His words had shaken Sasuke, chipped his armor. He was still able to stir up the feelings that Sasuke had locked deep inside himself. That was why Sasuke wanted to kill him.

"That's enough, Naruto." Kakashi interrupted, "I'll take care of Sasuke. You still have your dream of becoming Hokage. There's no need for you to go down with him."

Naruto snorted softly. Hokage…

He wanted people to acknowledge and respect him. It was his dream, the reason he had trained so hard for all these years. But he realized now he didn't care for the villagers acknowledgement anymore. He wasn't alone. He had friends who cared about him. He knew now he didn't need the whole world to love him. And he had already decided he wasn't going to live without Sasuke. Besides…

"How could I call myself Hokage if I can't even save one friend?"

'_Isn't that right, Sasuke?'_

"The only person Sasuke's fighting, is me!"

Sasuke smirked briefly.

"Have it your way." He said, "I'll kill you first."

'_You won't even be able to put a scratch on my forehead!' _Naruto could almost hear the unspoken words.

"Heh… you still haven't accepted me as an equal."

A silence fell over them as Naruto and Sasuke continued to stare at each other. Naruto took in every inch of his face, knowing that the next time they met would be the last.

'_I wish it didn't have to be this way.'_

"Let's go, Sasuke." Tobi said, breaking the silence.

"Madara, you and I need to talk." Sasuke said, his eyes never leaving Naruto. They continued to look at one another even as Sasuke disappeared into a swirling vortex, leaving Naruto standing and staring at the empty space he had just occupied.

So… that was it, then. All the cards had been laid on the table. Despite the situation Naruto currently found himself in, a sense of peace washed over him. It was going to be over soon.

"I'm ready when you are, Sasuke."


End file.
